Topics

PEI (3) drinking (3) art (2) DH (1) HF (1) IWA (1) Skyrim (1) beer (1) food (1) gaming (1) graffiti (1) islanders (1) metal (1) music (1) papers (1) smoking (1)

December 31, 2011

The products of PEI's education system...

... are professional editors who don't know "shute" isn't a word. (see article)
I don't even know what to say. The English language is really going down the poop chute.
An another note, I hope the poor guy is okay, that has got to hurt.

Reason to listen to metal #902: It's louder than twenty Islanders in a blizzard

I woke up to about a half a dozen slack-jawed yokels guffawing in the hallway outside my apartment. Having lived here all my life, I have no patience left for the country-bumpkin way of life, and especially not for its proponents. The offending accents sounded of Montague or somewhere else on the East end, but it's hard to be sure because I don't speak Islander very well. For those who have no idea what I'm talking about, Maritime accents are sort of like the Pikey accent (Brad Pitt's character in Snatch) except more nasally and slower. Here are some examples of fairly common Islanderisms, complete with translations.

"He's roight ettuv'er, can't get the car etta the g'rage."
"Roight ettuv'er" = "Right out of her"
"Etta the g'rage" = "Out of the garage"
Contrary to American belief, not all Canadians say oot and aboot, here in the East Coast it's more like "ewt". In conjunction with "of", it becomes a shorter "ett". The f in "of" is usually dropped unless "her" is added, in which case you get the contraction of'er; out of'er = "ettuv'er". Garage here is not "gah-RAHJ", the g and r have no vowel in-between and the last syllable becomes the harsh, nasally "readge".


"She's a slippy one today, I was drivin' wide-open and slid a fair piece on the ice."
Islanders almost never say slippery, it is always slippy, and in this case "she" means the weather or outdoor conditions. "Wide-open" is kind of like full-throttle, except only hicks say it. One can play music wide-open, drive down the highway wide-open, probably even projectile vomit wide-open. I'm unsure of the origins or limits of this yokel-ism. A "fair piece" is an indefinite unit of measurement. Just how far is a fair piece? Usually the speaker doesn't even know.

"Okay there buddy, I could care less. Fuckin' do somethin'!"
Little do you know, this guy wants to fight you! "Buddy" is something an Islander will only call you when you are not his buddy, i.e. he doesn't know your name and doesn't like you much.
To confuse matters, Islanders think "could" and "couldn't" mean the same thing, as the proper expression is "couldn't care less"; if one could care less, then one still cares a little bit, even though the expression is meant to express a lack of caring.
And finally, the overall uselessness of Islanders is summed up with the way they ask you to fight: "Do somethin'!", usually shouted with one fist raised above the head as though they were taught how to punch by the Notre Dame "Fightin' Irish" logo. They don't want to start anything of course and often take back their (poor excuses for) words, regardless how many people they have with them. Just act like you're from Trawna (Toronto) and they'll shit their over-alls.

So that about sums it up, I absolutely cannot stand hearing people from this Island in the adjacent hallway hahah, and so Slayer is my savior this morning. I may post some more Islanderisms some day, for now I'm off to clean and shower. I'm going to a friend's New Year's Eve party so I'll have plenty of pictures to post another time!

New Year's Eve's Eve

So far I've had three vodka-Red Rains, plenty of smoke and I'm going to make a Michelada after this post. I consider this training for tomorrow night; if I still have a hangover when I get drunk again, I think they'll cancel each other out... right?

In other news, jalapeño poppers are fucking delicious and I wish I had bought five shit-tonnes of them. They would have been awesome with my Mexicanly-prepared beer, with the "ñ" and the spiciness and whatnot.


The other day I started playing as a female Khajit in Skyrim, I have to say that after my fifth character I greatly prefer using the Khajit's hand-to-hand style. It does a shocking amount of damage, anyone who plays should seriously try it. I got the PC version the night it came out, and to date I have the following characters:
  • Drakios the Argonian: I made my first character look like a dragon, being Dragonborn and all. I didn't really know where I was going with my character so I made a new one. Haven't played Drakios since.
  • Danyil the Nord: My second character looks a bit like me, and has my name with a more Nord spelling. I play him occasionally, but got a bit bored after completing a few faction questlines.
  • Forgot-her-name Mona Lisa the Wood Elf: Sam made this character for me, I can't remember her name but I'll check the next time I play her name is Mona Lisa and it was funny because Sam didn't think it would really show the beheading at the start of the game, haha she was appalled. I don't play this character but I may some day.
  • Xavier the Redguard: I realized my other characters were in the Imperial Legion, so I decided to make a Stormcloak-aligned character. I also tried to make him a "good-guy", albeit one who still steals and murders. It's just that usually I'm even more of an asshole than that. I found the Redguard's strength and extra Stamina very useful.
  • Loki the Khajit: After seeing YouTube videos of user Robbaz beating the ever-loving shit out of all kinds of things, I decided I would also make a good fisticuffs character. Since it's a Khajit I tried to make it look like my cat, Loki. You can't make an all-black Khajit (racist bastards) so it's not really even close, but it's already pretty easy to kick some ass without a sword after just two days.
I'll post pictures of my characters soon, and maybe a bit more about the playing styles I use for each of them. Enough typing words though, I'm going to open Steam and get ready for some hardcore WASD action. Peace.

December 30, 2011

Like a Phoenix rising from the ashes of my own heartburn

Sam and I, check out Sam's weblog at http://samantha-skywalker.blogspot.com!
I got some sleep and bought Tums with my groceries today, now I can drink whisky without waking up dead! I think the Michelada last night probably didn't help.

Beer, tomato juice, lime juice, Worcestershire sauce, hot sauce and spice. Have at you, stomach! (photo from Wikipedia)
It's basically a Mexican Caesar with beer instead of vodka, and it is excellent. I still have beer left so I'll probably make another today, I'm not too gun-shy since I've bought Tums. My Michelada is a more Canadian version, however:
  • Molson XXX (7.3% ABV)
  • Clamato juice instead of tomato juice
  • lemon juice instead of lime
  • Worcestershire sauce
  • Frank's Red Hot sauce
  • celery salt instead of chili powder
Not very Mexican ingredients, but nonetheless; ¡Ándele! ¡Ándele! ¡Arriba!

Heartburn

I've been up since 6:30am, couldn't get back to sleep with heartburn. Sam's still asleep, looks like I get to stealth post....

December 29, 2011

Novakiin

I only have five papers left, this drooling asshole on the warning insert must have smoked them all. It wasn't me!

The Obligatory First Post

Unfortunately chronology restricts me from making my second or third post first, so I'll just get this first post out of the way. After minutes and minutes of painstaking twiddling and typing, I have finished creating this weblog. Why, you ask?
Well, as it turns out I have a terrible memory. I also spend lots of time in front of a computer not really doing anything, so I have decided to start using the endless jiggabits of memory on the Internet to my advantage. Every day I'm going to take photos of myself and whatever is happening around me, and post them here. It's not only to help me remember things, but also to enhance your overall Internet-perusing experience. Enjoy!